An Article in ADOPTIVE FAMILIES Magazine

Please take a moment to visit Adoptive Families magazine and read “What to Expect When She’s Expecting,” my most recent piece for this esteemed publication.

It’s about August’s birthmother, who at the time of the writing was six months pregnant and choosing to parent.

We met the baby last Saturday, the day the magazine arrived on our doorstep.

Fortuitous . . . like so much we’ve encountered on this beautiful journey.


Falling into Place

Today August visited with his birthmother, who is seven-and-a-half months pregnant.

Today his birthmother also signed a photo release for an upcoming article of mine that will be published in the September issue of Adoptive Families magazine.   It’s a photo of her and August (and a beautiful one, too,  if I do say so myself) taken last fall.

I highlighted the gist of the article–how you explain to a child who joined his/her family through adoption a birthmother’s pregnancy and her subsequent decision to parent.  I explained why the magazine wanted to use the photo and then asked her about how she would like to be identified in the caption.

His birthmother handed back to me the signed release and told me that she hopes one day to do some writing herself–to explain to prospective birthmothers the benefits of making an adoption plan, to help ease their fears and highlight the benefits.

An hour-and-a-half later August put his hand on his birthmother’s belly to feel the baby.

And by the time our two-hour visit had ended, I had the feeling that we were all doing just fine.

The Washington Times

I would like to thank Andrea Poe, accomplished, prolific, and immensely talented author and, yes, descendant of “my second-favorite Edgar,” for believing in my work and featuring an adaptation of one of my favorite blog posts in her “Red Thread” Adoptive Family Forum in The Washington Times Communities section.

I am honored to be included among the distinguished voices writing on this most important topic.

Thank you, Andrea.

“The Creative Mama”: October 2011

Here is the link to this month’s installment of “The Play’s the Thing” on The Creative Mama.

I am very proud of my affiliation with this outstanding site and particularly proud of this piece.

We’ve had a lot of changes around here lately since Edgar’s diagnosis of epilepsy.  And while these changes have presented challenges I never would have anticipated, they have also presented previously unknown depths of compassion. 

Please comment–here and/or on the The Creative Mama–and let me know what you think. 

And thank you, always, for reading.

No Choice in the Matter

Oscar asked me last night why I write. 

He sees me writing regularly, knows that something is afoot in terms of my hoping one day to publish a book, and has seen his and his brothers’ mugs in Adoptive Families magazine on three separate occasions.

Before I could answer, though, Oscar attempted to respond for me: “Mom, do you write because you hope you’ll be famous some day?”

The short answer to that is an unequivocal NO.  And the capital letters were intentional. I’m yelling that one.  Fame holds no interest for me.  I adore anonymity. 

But as much as I might like occasionally to channel my inner recluse, I am also too much a part of this world.  I thoroughly enjoy talking to people, interacting with others.  I’m a teacher, and I love my job.  So, as much as I enjoy flying as low under the radar as possible, I know that I don’t. 

Recently, too, I have had to emerge from my comfortable cocoon and engage in what for me is a bit foreign–networking (social and otherwise) and self-promotion.  If I hope to one day publish, I need to establish a platform (read: followers, and lots of them); and to establish a platform, I need to sell myself. 

Which brings me back to Oscar’s question–which I think was less about why I write and more about why I am hoping to publish.  Writing a blog with a following of mainly friends and family is one thing; hoping to convince a publisher that what you have to say is marketable is another–and it takes a whole lot of work I am not accustomed to doing.  And, truthfully, it takes work with which I am not always comfortable.

So what is the reason? 

I guess it’s pretty simple.  The answer lies in the person who posed the question in the first place–as well as his two brothers.  My children are my muses; and in this life I have dedicated to learning, they have been my most profound teachers.  What I have learned from them I am compelled to share.  I have no choice.  There is no alternative.

And that is what I told Oscar.  He looked at me and nodded as if he understood completely–as if it were what he had been waiting to hear, a response that, quite frankly, couldn’t have been topped by the nine goddesses themselves.