Anyone who has ever dined with a four- and a five-year-old, or specifically with Oscar and Edgar, knows that the meal often does resemble a theatrical performance. There is a set, plenty of props, and plenty of drama. However, dinner has recently taken on a new theatrical twist–specifically, puppet theater. And the performance stars August.
Here’s a little snippet of last night’s dinner.
Act I, scene i
Five-year-old Oscar is seated stage left, happily nibbling on a grilled cheese sandwich. Seated stage right is four-year-old Edgar, enjoying spaghetti and meatballs–restaurant leftovers from the night before. Between the two is seated their mother, with three-month-old August on her lap. August is incredibly interested in what his brothers are eating.
Edgar: (with a mouthful of dinner) Mommy, make August talk.
Mother: (only the slightest of pauses) What do you want him to say?
Edgar: I want him to talk about dinner.
Mother: (channeling her inner ventriloquist, giving voice to August’s thoughts): What are you eating, Edgar?
Edgar: Spaghetti and meatballs. Want some, baby August?
Mother whispers in August’s ear, imparting some obviously important information.
August: Our mother says I can’t have them yet because I don’t have teeth. This makes me mad! (August, in mock frustration, “bangs” his fists on the table.)
Edgar: Ah, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Oscar: How would you like a little of my grilled cheese? It’s not fair that all you get is a bottle–even though you haven’t grown your incisor and canine teeth.
August: I can’t eat that either. This is VERY frustrating!!
At this point, August burps a most impressive burp.
Oscar: Ha, ha! Good job, August! And don’t worry, August, even if you burp so loud my head explodes, I will still always love you.
Edgar: That’s disgusting.